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DjJoe's Rants

Pokemon- Intellectual Powerhouses

Rating: 5 votes, 4.00 average.
Slowpoke is smarter than you.

That's right. Slowpoke. The Pokemon that at least acts like the dumbest thing ever to existed is smarter than anyone, you included. How does that make you feel?


Ok, so you're probably wondering how I make this claim. Here's how.


Do you know the English Language? Spanish? Japanese? Chinese? Latin? French? German? Polish? Ancient Egyptian?

I only listed 9 languages, but there are tons more. But most people, even the most intelligent, can only master oh-so-many.

Now let's look at Slowpoke- Any given Slowpoke knows 650 different languages. Fluently. A slowpoke can only speak one, yes, but that is due to an evolutionary fault at being able to produce 7different sounds- S,L,O,W,P,K,E (O is repeated). However, Slowpoke can interpret 650 different languages, and respond accordingly.

But not just Slowpoke. I only use Slowpoke because we all associate Slowpoke with little to no intelligence. And we even put it behind Magikarp in that respect. But Magikarp, and all other Pokemon in fact, are more intelligent than we tend to think. They are ALL born into this world being able to interpret 650 languages at minimum. Here's a beginning of the list of the languages, in a relatively familiar order, assuming the native country speaks English:

  1. Bulbasaur
  2. Ivysaur
  3. Venusaur
  4. Charmander
  5. Charmeleon
  6. Charizard
  7. Squirtle
  8. Wartotle
  9. Blastoise
  10. Caterpie
  11. Metapod
  12. Butterfree
  13. Weedle
  14. Kakuna
  15. Beedrill
  16. Pidgey
  17. Pidgeotto
  18. Pidgeot
  19. Rattata
  20. Raticate
  21. Spearow
  22. Fearow
  23. Ekans
  24. Arbok
  25. Pikachu


And that's only the first 25! They go all the way up to 650, with 649 being Genesect, and 650 being the English Language. (Or, whereever your country of origin happens to be).

Let's not forget, however, that all pokemon react to human speech and respond accordingly. That means that aside from the 649 Pokemon Languages we currently know about, and the language you speak most commonly, they also understand every other human language in the WORLD. They also understand every single pokemon they encounter, from Charmander to Zapdos, and Lillipup to Deoxys. They are able to speak to each other in two separate languages and be completely ok with that. A simple "Pi pi ka pi, Chaaa" can be interpreted from a Pikachu by any other pokemon, and Pikachu can understand anything any other pokemon says to it. "Pikachu, Thunderbolt attack" is also fully audible and understandable when spoken to it by a human trainer.

So just remember- the next time you think a Pokemon is stupid or dumb because it hurts itself from confusion, just think where you'd be if you had the knowledge of every language in the World PLUS the knowledge of 4 attacks that may or may not be complex, PLUS the knowledge on how to survive.

Updated 09/04/2011 at 04:31 PM by djjoe227

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