Pokémon TCG: Sword and Shield—Brilliant Stars

Zubat: A Short Story by Poinko

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poinko

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Zubat: A Short Story

[gal= 50178]
2010-7-15 Zubat UL 070
[/gal]
A Card of the Day Post by : Poinko

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WOW it's another Zubat card! TPCi, you are so good to us!

Look here, now. First of all, it's Zubat, you can't really ask for much more than that, so already it's a great deal. Then, they make the card even sweeter by giving it 50 HP. I don't know about you, but 50 HP is totally awesome. I wish I had 50 HP. And you know what, when I play this card, I have 50 HP, so it's like I'm getting something special in return. Baby Pokemon don't get 50 HP. They only get 30. Pfft, 30, you can't do ANYTHING with 30 HP. Hoppip WISHES it could be Zubat, then maybe it might stick around for a turn.

Next, dude, Glide for 10. That's a Colorless attack. You don't have to attach a Psychic energy, but you can if you really want to. That's the beauty of Colorless attacks. Zubat just became a total splash-able powerhouse.

Whoa now, put the bacon back on the stove because what's this? Zubat has a SECOND attack. You thought Glide was awesome? Get a load of this: Double Attack. You get to smack two of your opponent's Pokemon for 10 damage EACH. That's like a double-Crobat G. And EVERYONE uses Crobat G. So this card is obviously twice as good as Crobat G. And even if their benched Pokemon are resistant? Tough noogies, you ignore that resistance. Not so hot now, are you Tyranitar? Didn't think so! Plus the attack is called Double Attack. You are essentially attacking TWICE. Zubat is just breaking all the rules of the game and he doesn't even care because that's how Zubat rolls. If you can't handle it, then you can just go home, son.

After all that, how can it possibly get any better, you ask? Easy. Resistance to Fighting. Donphan's gonna have a hard time with this beast!

Of course, a card that is so earth-shatteringly powerful has got to have SOME kind of drawback right? Well, yeah, you can't have EVERYONE playing Zubat ALL the time, so he's got a weakness to Lightning, which isn't so bad really, and a one retreat cost which, seriously, you're not going to use. A Zubat never shows his back to an enemy. If the power of Glide is just too much for your brain to handle, you can retreat anyway, since you've already got an energy on Zubat. Of course only the manliest of men would even entertain the very NOTION of making Zubat active. Every time you get Zubat in your opening hand, you'll grow a rich, full beard and your shirt will transform into rugged flannel. Zubat has the power to turn even the meekest players into full-on lumberjacks, and after you take that last prize, you can stand up, laugh a full, hearty laugh, and go off into the Canadian wilderness to cut down trees and wrestle gigantic grizzly bears.

There you have it. TPCi has managed to harvest the very essence awesome, distill it, magnify it and press it into card form. A whiff of that bracing scent as you pull a Zubat from your booster pack is enough to make your chest explode in a massive, sprawling field of hair.

Zubat, I salute you.
 
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Question: If I am already a lumberjack, what does the power of Zubat have to offer me?
 
........-facepalm- i can't believe that this is on the front page...but it is the best zubat we are able to use now, so i'll give you that.
 
Good stuff, brah.
Well worth my two mintues, and I am quite stingy with my allotments of two-minute intervals.
 
I wish that the match up section of most feature articles was as realistic and unbiased as this review of Zubat.

Good job!
 
WoW that's the best thread ever just LoL and my parents are shouting, because I they were sleeping, but then I started to LoL and they woke up, because I LoLed as loud as a gigantic Grizzly bear.
Clapping my hands on my Face trying to wake myself up, because I didn't believe what I read some moments before.
But I didn't wake up and LoLed just more, and please don't think that I LoLed, because I was hurting myself and I didn't even LoLed because of this thread, I LoLed because life treated me with such a great story.
Fom now on I thought that I will put my Crobat Gs out of my Sablelock and put in this amazingly awesome Zubat.
And it worked, because I could do 20 more damage for this 2 Zubats than with two single Crobat Gs.
Isn't this the best card in format?
Luxray has to take a cold shower, because this card is much better, seeing that it doesn't have to use a Poke-Power to bring up any Pokemon.
No!
It is better it chooses the Pokemon to attack and stops the hated Power Spray drops to stop your Bright Look and it also attacks 2 Pokemon, what makes the card much faster and much better for any "In Game" Strategy.

This is what I was about to say.^^
Darkmot.
 
poinko said:
Of course only the manliest of men would even entertain the very NOTION of making Zubat active. Every time you get Zubat in your opening hand, you'll grow a rich, full beard and your shirt will transform into rugged flannel. Zubat has the power to turn even the meekest players into full-on lumberjacks, and after you take that last prize, you can stand up, laugh a full, hearty laugh, and go off into the Canadian wilderness to cut down trees and wrestle gigantic grizzly bears.
Click to expand...

It took me all the way to this part before I started laughing. But when I did, it was like a dam being GLIDED
 
I played this card today in my machamp crobat prime deck......this maybe insaltive but on first turn i rare candyied in to crobat prime maybe if hes that good as you say i should of kept it the same...yea
 
For those that just have to 'stab' at this post, understand that this is something to enjoy and remind you of how FUN this Game truly is!! If only more ppl loved the game like Poinko, imagine how entertaining Tournaments would be!! Also, note how well written and descriptive this is for just a CotD! If only some Article Submissions were as well thought out!

Great CotD Post Poinko!! Keep 'em Coming!!
 
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