WOW it's another Zubat card! TPC, you are so good to us!
Look here, now. First of all, it's Zubat, you can't really ask for much more than that, so already it's a great deal. Then, they make the card even sweeter by giving it 50 HP. I don't know about you, but 50 HP is totally awesome. I wish I had 50 HP. And you know what, when I play this card, I have 50 HP, so it's like I'm getting something special in return. Baby Pokemon don't get 50 HP. They only get 30. Pfft, 30, you can't do ANYTHING with 30 HP. Hoppip WISHES it could be Zubat, then maybe it might stick around for a turn.
Next, dude, Glide for 10. That's a Colorless attack. You don't have to attach a Psychic energy, but you can if you really want to. That's the beauty of Colorless attacks. Zubat just became a total splashable powerhouse.
Whoa now, put the bacon back on the stove because what's this? Zubat has a SECOND attack. You thought Glide was awesome? Get a load of this: Double Attack. You get to smack two of your opponent's Pokemon for 10 damage EACH. That's like a double-Crobat G. And EVERYONE uses Crobat G. So this card is obviously twice as good as Crobat G. And even if their benched Pokemon are resistant? Tough noogies, you ignore that resistance. Not so hot now, are you Tyranitar? Didn't think so! Plus the attack is called Double Attack. You are essentially attacking TWICE. Zubat is just breaking all the rules of the game and he doesn't even care because that's how Zubat rolls. If you can't handle it, then you can just go home, son.
After all that, how can it possibly get any better, you ask? Easy. Resistance to Fighting. Donphan's gonna have a hard time with this beast!
Of course, a card that is so earth-shatteringly powerful has got to have SOME kind of drawback right? Well, yeah, you can't have EVERYONE playing Zubat ALL the time, so he's got a weakness to Lightning, which isn't so bad really, and a one retreat cost which, seriously, you're not going to use. A Zubat never shows his back to an enemy. If the power of Glide is just too much for your brain to handle, you can retreat anyway, since you've already got an energy on Zubat. Of course only the manliest of men would even entertain the very NOTION of making Zubat active. Every time you get Zubat in your opening hand, you'll grow a rich, full beard and your shirt will transform into rugged flannel. Zubat has the power to turn even the meekest players into full-on lumberjacks, and after you take that last prize, you can stand up, laugh a full, hearty laugh, and go off into the Canadian wilderness to cut down trees and wrestle gigantic grizzly bears.
There you have it. TPC has managed to harvest the very essence awesome, distill it, magnify it and press it into card form. A whiff of that bracing scent as you pull a Zubat from your booster pack is enough to make your chest explode in a massive, sprawling field of hair.
Zubat, I salute you.
