So you are saying you're taking an illogical stance?
Morality sometimes requires us to make great sacrifices. You'd sacrifice whatever feelings you had to be able to kill for 200 but not for 2? What the difference, the number? What about to save three? Five? Is it some arbitrary number, because so far it seems that you don't know the number, but there is no rationality behind the number, so it's just a random assignment.
You were conditioned to cherish youth? Does that mean that you know it's some other factor, not real moral rule, that says that, for you at least, killing a child is wrong?
I completely acknowledge my stance as illogical.
Why would a gal get with a guy for a million dollars, but not for twenty dollars? It's all just gettin' for money after all.
Why would I kill to save for 200, but not 2? I don't know what number tips the scales. Rationally the number should be 2, and being forced to think about it, I would consider 2; but I feel much more comfortable with 200.
My conditioning as an Infantry soldier would require me to save a woman before a man. Completely illogical, but the Army reinforces the don't hit a girl thing that we're raised with with a healthy dose of protecting the weak and fighting to keep Mary safe and free back at home. I know that most women are not weak and don't need protecting, while there are some men who are weak and do need protection; but the conditioning would likely influence my course of action.
So women and children have more value to me than men. With no basis in any kind of fair moral code. Just the way it is.
I have absolutely no logical reason, based in logic, for wanting greater reward for breaking the inhibition to kill, for favoring saving children over adults, for favoring saving women over men. Upon examination I am comfortable with my inclinations.