Pokémon TCG: Sword and Shield—Brilliant Stars

Rocket's Master Plan-Comments Thread

Interesting fic (*gasp!* Marril's responding to another fic!). Can't comment on how the plot's developing, though I have a nagging tendency to superimpose my mental image of the Ryan from SS onto your Ryan.
 
didn't know there was a ryan in SS, haven't read it, i might, but that could take a while considering the 51 chapters XD. Anyways to tell the truth, Jill, Ryan, and Lauren are all named after kids at my school who arent exactly...anywhere near friends with me :p. Charles and Hank just randomly popped into my head, and I still dont know what to name the grunt from chapter 1, despite his main character later on-ness...
 
I'm not being rude, just giving helpful feedback!

I like the plot, and I like the characters. I also like how you're doing a set around it. The one thing I don't like is that, well, it is just plain boring. The topic is interesting, but the first 2 chapters are exposition. Usually you should take care of that all in one chapter.

Again, I'm not trying to be rude, I'm just trying to help. Sorry if I hurt any feelings (I know I should apologize in advance because this'll get some rebuttle and I know it).
 
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and indeed it will get rebuttle. I don't see how you figure that, there is action in the 2nd chapter, if by exposition you mean introducing the plot. I guess you could be right, but I mean hey, watching a Golem dismantle a room full of traps by itself is pretty actiony if you ask me ;x. Anyways, in case you still think I'm just opening the plot, it takes time. This is going to be a long story, as it covers all 3 sets in the RMP trilogy. If you crave immediate action, you might be pleased with chapters 3 and 4, coming out right after this post ;x
 
Rocket's Master Plan Character BIOS:
---
Derek
Species: Human Male
Age: 13
Physical Appearance:
Hair: Raggedy Brown
Eyes: Black
Clothes: Green Turtleneck sweater, Blue sweatpants, Team Rocket Hat
Pokemon:
-Hypno
-Flaffy
-Poliwhirl
-Nuzleaf
-Magcargo
Nature: Kind
Likes: Pokemon, Freedom
Dislikes: Team Rocket, His older siblings
Short Descrip: Derek was a Team Rocket Grunt, forced to by his older siblings. He was rescued by Nick and Augustus the Skitty. He now fights with them against Team Rocket
---
Charles
Species: Human Male
Age: 15
Physical Appearance:
Hair: Combed Blond
Eyes: Brown
Clothes: Standard Black and White Rocket Male Uniform(like James from pokemon tv show)
Pokemon:
-Fearow
-Gengar
-Rayquaza
-Ho-oh
-Lugia
-Mewtwo(now permanent member of team)
Nature: Cruel
Likes: Evil, Team Rocket, The thought of Fearow eating Weedle and Caterpie
Dislikes: Derek, Unrespectful Grunts, Freedom
Short Descrip: A Member of Giovanni's Elite 5 person squad, Leader of the A-Squad.
---
Jill
Species: Human Female
Age: 15
Physical Appearance:
Hair: Fluffy Orange in two braids
Eyes: Green
Clothes: Standard Black and White Rocket Female Uniform(like Jessie from pokemon tv show)
Pokemon:
-Crobat
-Magneton
-Golem
-Entei
-Raikou
-Suicune
Nature: Cruel
Likes: Evil, Team Rocket, Strawberry Ice Cream
Dislikes: Derek, Pointless obvious outcome fights, Not getting things her way(and therefore prefers burger king over other fast food places ;x)
Short Descrip: A member of Giovanni's Elite 5 squad, Leader of the B-Squad. It has also been descovered that she is a commander of the elements, rivaling Claire in skill.
---
Hank
Species: Human Male
Age: 16
Physical Appearance:
Hair: Not visible
Eyes: Black
Clothes: black spiked leather Motor gang clothes, blue bandana covering his hair
Pokemon:
-Arcanine
-Victrebell
-Houndoom
-???
-???
-???
Nature: Rowdy
Likes: Evil, Team Rocket, Motorcycles, Gangs
Dislikes: Derek, admitting things to his teammates, people who try to take off his bandana
Short Descrip: A member of the elite squad, leader of the C-Squad
---
Lauren
Species: Human Female
Age: 16
Physical Appearance:
Hair: Long Black hair reaching her knees
Eyes: Green
Clothes: Standard team rocket female uniform
Pokemon:
-Ditto
-Rhydon
-Hitmontop
-Scizor
-Absol
-Nosepass
Nature: Amuseable
Likes: Evil, Team Rocket, Derek's misfortunes(such as machoke vomit)
Dislikes: Derek, people who tell her to shut up, the true inner strength of seemingly weak people and pokemon(such as Michael's torchic)
Short Descrip: A member of the elite squad, leader of the D-Squad
---
Augustus
Species: Male Skitty
Age: 8 in Skitty Years
Physical Appearance:
Hair: Uh, normal Skitty color, pink/cream ;x
Eyes: Black
Clothes: -_- Skitty dont wear clothes, silly!
Pokemon:
himself? no, really. -_- NONE.
Nature: Helpful
Likes: Nick, Derek, running around, showing off
Dislikes: Team Rocket, being beaten
Short Descrip: The mascot and only talking Pokemon in the rebellion
---
Nick
Species: Human Male
Age: 13
Physical Appearance:
Hair: Straight Blond
Eyes: Green, Glasses
Clothes: Navy Blue polo shirt with red stripes on the shoulders, navy blue jeans
Pokemon:
-Augustus(Skitty)
-Dodrio
-Dragonair
-Raichu
-Sealeo
Pokemon he has had:
-Onix(turned out to be Lauren's Ditto)
Nature: Friendly
Likes: Derek, fighting team rocket, Shayna(maybe a little too much)
Dislikes: Team Rocket, being taken by surprise
Short Descrip: A member of the rebellion against team rocket, he is one of the few that knew of their plans ahead of time.
---
Shayna
Species: Human Female
Age: 13
Physical Appearance:
Hair: Long Curly Brown
Eyes: Blue
Clothes: blue T-shirt with a picture of a white fish with insanely big teeth on the front, blue jeans, backpack for all her skecthbooks
Pokemon:
-Smeargle
-Smeargle
-Smeargle
-Smeargle
-Smeargle
Nature: Ecstatic
Likes: Sketching, Sketching, More Sketching, Nick
Dislikes: Team Rocket, having her Smeargle's Sketch move turned back on her, people who hate art
Short Descrip: The main field researcher of the rebellion. She can capture every detail when it comes to sketching
---
Michael
Species: Human Male
Age: 13
Physical Appearance:
Hair: Brown Mullet reaching bottom of neck
Eyes: Brown
Clothes: black T-shirt and shorts with flame designs
Pokemon:
-Torchic
-Absol
-Kyuubi Ninetales(stolen from Ryan)
-Jirachi(blinding light)
-???
-???
Nature: Leader-like
Likes: Being in charge, making last minute save the day appearances, mocking team rocket
Dislikes: subordinates who cant fend for themselves, team rocket, overconfidence
Short Descrip: The leader of the rebellion, extremely skilled on a computer
---
Ditto
Species: Ditto(Genderless)
Age: 15(in human and ditto years)
Physical Appearance:
Hair: It doesnt have hair...
Eyes: Black
Clothes: Uh...no.
Pokemon Transformed into/permanently inlisted in it's Transformdex:
-Smeargle
-Dragonite
-Ho-oh
Nature: Whiney
Likes: Riding on Lauren's shoulder, laughing evilly, Lauren, Evil, Team Rocket
Dislikes: Rebellion, Derek, having to do all the work
Short Descrip: Lauren's Ditto. It has the ability to speak, as few Pokemon do in Team Rocket, usually only altered experiments(Ditto is altered, it's only gained abilities were speech and the ability to keep any attacks it copies while it is a Smeargle)
---
Ryan
Species: Human Male
Age: 17
Physical Appearance:
Hair: Short, Black
Eyes: Dark Blue
Clothes: Standard Rocket Male Uniform with a dark blue T-Shirt and white shorts underneath(not yet known what these are for)
Pokemon:
-Tropius
-Golduck
-Cloyster
-Lanturn
-Sceptile
Pokemon he has had:
-Kyuubi Ninetales(Stolen by Michael)
Nature: Mixed/Lonely
Likes: Evil, Team Rocket, Corphish(though he does not own any, he has an INSANE love for Corphish. It is his greatest weakness.)
Dislikes: Derek, Falling off flying Pokemon, being mistreated/underestimated, being introduced last when the 5 members are being introduced.
Short Descrip: A member of the Rocket Elite squad and the leader of the E-Squad, Ryan is often left behind by his fellow elites, despite being the oldest by 2 months(to Lauren).
---
Claire
Species: Human Female
Age: 23
Physical Appearance:
Hair: Black
Eyes: Blue
Clothes: Same as what was worn in Pokemon Gold, Silver, and Crystal.
Pokemon:
-Latias
-Dragonite
-Kingdra
-Milotic
-Flygon
-Salamence
Nature: Caring, Gentle(Unknown what it will be after hypnotism)
Likes: Tarot cards, Mrs. Cleo's Psychic Hotline, walking through the park with her Latias and/or Lance
Dislikes: Team Rocket, Evil, stronger commanders of the elements then herself
Short Descrip: The Gym Leader of the Blackthorn City Gym and one of the Gym Leaders hypnotized by Team Rocket, she is also a commander of the elements and has amazing powers with tarot cards. Her brother is Lance.
---
Lance
Species: Human Male
Age: 26
Physical Appearance:
Hair: Red
Eyes: Green
Clothes: Same as in Pokemon Gold, Silver, and Crystal.
Pokemon:
-Latios
-Dragonite
-Dragonair
-Aerodactyl
-Gyarados
-Charizard
Nature: Protective
Likes: Walking through the park with Latios and/or Claire, working with Claire, defeating Team Rocket
Dislikes: Team Rocket, Evil, people who hurt Claire
Short Descrip: Formerly a member of the Johto Elite 4, Lance now solely battles against Team Rocket and other Evils. He has an undying love for Claire just like his Latios' love for her Latias, both of which are of the strongest love in the world. His sister is Claire.
---
Blaine
Species: Human Male
Age: 36
Physical Appearance:
Hair: Bald
Eyes: Black
Clothes: White lab coat, like in the games.
Pokemon:
-Ninetales(Regular)
-Arcanine
-Rapidash
-Torkoal
-Magcargo
-Houndoom
Pokemon he has had:
-Kyuubi Ninetales(taken back by Michael due to lack of control)
Nature: Two Faced
Likes: Double Crossing People, when a plan comes together, power, the word "Indeed"
Dislikes: Team Rocket, being defeated, being outwitted(especially by females)
Short Descrip: A double crossing two timing guy. Rawr. Was supposedly on Team Rocket, but had an agenda of his own, working for the enemy. He was found out and outwitted by Jill, and is no longer allowed in team rocket property, because he is thought to be dead.
---
Robo-Giovanni
Species: Android taking over Giovanni
Age: Robots are Ageless
Physical Appearance:
Hair: Robots don't have hair
Eyes: Glowy Red, terminator-like.
Clothes: Giovanni's clothes, I guess...the ones from the games, the black suit and stuff.
Pokemon:
-Mr.Mime
-Kangaskhan
-Tyrannitar
-Nidoking
-Nidoqueen
-Rhydon
Nature: Evil
Likes: Evil, Taking over People, Destruction
Dislikes: Good, being defeated, not killing things
Short Descrip: An evil robot parasite that found it's way into Giovanni, transforming and taking over his body. Luckily he was defeated by Jill, but he might come back....
---
More will be added as they come up/I feel they are necessary(for example Ryan's is currently unnecessary)
Newest Update: Added Hank's Houndoom, Robo-Giovanni, and Blaine
 
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What the?!That Torchic is just strange.Anyways the story ig getting better and I think you have put a good start to it.But...A Torchic beating 5 strong Pokemon?Just strange...I look forward to chapter 5.
 
A Derek? Hey, that's my name, just spelled differently. ;)

And he's got a Hypno. Isn't that rather ironic? My name's Derrick (same as the fanfic, spelled differently), my screen name is HypnosProjectHQ. He has a Hypno!

LOL. Sorry, had to say that blibberish.
 
hey, blibberish is fun! :p Anyways yeah, other then Charles and Hank, all names are based off kids from my school...Augustus isn't the actual name of a kid, just a variation :p
 
Ancient Pokemon Trainer said:
KYUUBI or something?Is this something true or made up?
Click to expand...

mwehehe, references are fun. Kyuubi is a japanese legend, literally translated it means Nine Tails(basically Ninetales, except with Tails spelled right!) And, to go along with that, the legend of Kyuubi is, you guessed it, a giant Nine tailed fox of doom. They based Ninetales(or Kyuukon, in japanese) off Kyuubi. Also, it's in Naruto! :p
 
BT no offence but I'm dissapointed. Especialy when you say Skarmory is resistant to electric attacks. It is WEAK to electric attacks. And would you please reply I don't like triple posting.
 
silly silly, in case you didn't check, metal is resistant to...wait, no...electric is resistant to metal...DARNIT. Well uh...it was a special skarmory specifically trained against it's weakness! Yeah!
 
I wonder why when I battled Winona in my GBA I used Thunderbolt and it was super effective on Skarmory... Hmm must be a glitch or something right? lol.
 
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Electric does normal damage to Steel, and Flying is weak to it. Skarmory's only weaknesses are Electric and Fire, IIRC.
 
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